I am now back after having a long break from writing and internet! As some of you may well know I have travelled the east coast of Australia for the past 30 days or so. It has been an awesome journey and I have seen so many beautiful places. Me and a few friends of mine chose to travel in a campervan, I think it was one of the best choices we could make since it allowed us to choose wherever we wanted to go.
But I guess this is not really that interesting, if you want to know more I guess I'll tell you once we meet. If we never met then that information is probably irrelevant to begin with. So now I sit here in my bed in a 14 dorm room in Melbourne pondering about what important message I have for humanity today... Usually I start to write about me or something that I've experienced and then let it go from there, so I guess I will.
During the past few days I've had a constant struggle with myself when it comes to getting a job and realizing the fact that I need to work to be able to sustain my way of living here in Australia. However there is a part of me, a thought pattern if you will, that constantly say that it's not right and invokes a high sense of fear whenever I approach work of any kind. The same type of fear fills me when I meet new people, when people are mad at me, when I say something "stupid" or even sometimes during normal conversations.
I have been struggling with this fear for quite some time and sometimes it is "winning" and renders my social and living capabilites to zero. I become depressed and the fear increases in potency, I give in to the apathy. I think this is a common problem and I've also realized that the more I look outside of myself for answers and help the less I understand. Because in truth the fear is like an organism that feeds upon itself. Fear breeds fear and this has been the root of my problem ever since I started feeling small and useless.
But then as you might guess, I had a small revelation recently. Now just because I had it doesn't make the feeling go away, however now I realized that I have a choice every time the fear strikes me. I know there is another way out and another way to "avoid" it, which doesn't involve suppressing the emotion. Suppressing emotion is actually equally bad as dwelling in it, but it gives other symptoms such as physical illness. Anywho, there is always a concious choice of whether or not to "go in" to the emotion. So I can either choose to BE inside the emotion, which I'd rather not since fear is a pretty nasty feeling, or I can choose to observe it and breathe acceptance of myself.
Here comes the final element, and I think it's one of the toughest ones to achieve. Acceptance of self. It doesn't sound that hard, most of you readers probably think you have it. And I bet some of you do (Lucky bastards). But do YOU? Can you accept yourself as you are? Fully? Without attaching to any circumstance or behavior? That's a challenge indeed... See the whole society (here we go again) is built upon achieving stuff and becoming something to actually be accepted. So you probably think you are accepted because you have a nice job or perhaps being a nice person. And that, my friend, is called conditioning! Now you can only accept yourself if you have a nice job or if you are nice to people. So you're basically addicted to serving others or working instead of seeing the person behind this endless quest of acceptance. You! It is you!
Now what can you do to be accepted? Well to be honest I have no clue. Cause I am not you. Only you can know you. But I believe that it's not what we do that determines if we are accepted or not. Because we were all born accepted, so you are accepted! You just have to realize it and believe it. It is THAT simple. So in my eyes we can all choose to see behind the structure of society and ego that is constantly telling us to fit in to a specific frame which is somewhat unnatural, because the only this that is natural is how we are. But often what we are is shrouded by what we THINK we are, so first we have to get rid of that! And we all have our luggage. But underneath that lies something wonderful and amazing and that is the essence of you! So yes you are beautiful just as you are, and so am I, and so is your grumpy neighboor and everyone else in this entire world! So let's realize this together and usher into a new and unimaginably beautiful future!
Now what can you do to be accepted? Well to be honest I have no clue. Cause I am not you. Only you can know you. But I believe that it's not what we do that determines if we are accepted or not. Because we were all born accepted, so you are accepted! You just have to realize it and believe it. It is THAT simple. So in my eyes we can all choose to see behind the structure of society and ego that is constantly telling us to fit in to a specific frame which is somewhat unnatural, because the only this that is natural is how we are. But often what we are is shrouded by what we THINK we are, so first we have to get rid of that! And we all have our luggage. But underneath that lies something wonderful and amazing and that is the essence of you! So yes you are beautiful just as you are, and so am I, and so is your grumpy neighboor and everyone else in this entire world! So let's realize this together and usher into a new and unimaginably beautiful future!
